When the waiter brings our food, and mine looks way better than everyone else’s
Hold your applause.
Waking up to the hot guy/girl from the bar last night
And they’re still hot in the morning
BOOM SHAKALAKALAKAH!
When I hear the person next to me opening up a candy wrapper
And I’m just like
oh hai.
In undergrad, when I realized a hot senior was graduating
gbaby, you got that?
When my relatives start asking me why I haven’t found a nice boyfriend yet
I’m like,
just gimme the damn bottle
When it doesn’t work out with a guy
In high school I was like,
Now I’m like,
so true.
When Dr. Dre comes on
Me:
My parents:
uhm, a-fricking-men
Hearing someone call your name
Other girls:
Me:
When the waiter forgets to bring something I ordered
No matter what else is in front of me, I’m just like,
delicate
